Sunday, April 22, 2012

AARP up in arms over Skyfall Seniorcide seems like a scene right out of the South Park episode: Gray Dawn. AARP is livid over plans to kill off Judi Dench's "M" character for the 50th anniversary James Bond film Skyall (in theaters November 16th). AARP Spokesman Roger Dinkins blasted the decision suggesting ageism.

"Sure she [Dench] has a few health concerns, like millions of other retried persons, but never once has she stopped being productive. In fact seniors are the hardest working members of any acting troupe."

Controversy centers around Bond producers desire to replace Dench with a balding middle aged actor who works for scale.

"Look we've nothing against this young actor, he seems talented enough. And I've certainly enjoyed his other movies. But in our view nothing replaces experience. There is no reason to force the most experienced members of our society on to the sidelines. Not when they are willing and able to give more."

What appears to upset AAPR the most is a five minute lecture from a unidentified government health official appearing in the Skyfall script.

"The is a particularly disturbing scene where a health mister is counseling Judi's character on the virtues of euthanasia. My god can you imagine it! This health minister goes on to talk about lessening the burden on the healthcare system making the government better able to put those limited resources towards the more productive portion of the population. I believe the term used was investing resources to where the greatest returns are. Pure poppycock!"

Mr Dinkins said what concerns AARP member the most is the apparent shift in tone of many recent Hollywood movies.

"There is a budding populist movement to make ageism mainstream. No doubt in our minds this a new round of the War On Seniors. Clint Eastwood has them running scared, but he is only one man. Which is why AARP is so important."

When asked if the AARP will urge a boycott of the new Bond movie, Dinkins said no decisions were made, leaving the possibility open however they hoped the studio would see the folly of this long before Skyfall production comes to a halt.

"The sad part is this plot element is completely unnecessary and it goes against the studio's best interest.The overwhelming majority of the Bond audience is age fifty five or older. It is a stupid decision to alienate the largest portion of your audience."

We tired throughout the week to reach studio and production company for comment. As of  publication no statement was issued from the studios or production companies involved.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Craig skinhead Bond

The classical image image of Bond as a tall, handsome man has gone forever with the brave new world of the Craig Bond reboot. Bond is now a charmless short psychopath with a skinhead haircut. And Daniel Craig has annouced that he would "keep on going" with his bizarre interpretation of Bond.